Lyrics to 'Power Of Two' by Indigo Girls. Now the parking lot is empty Everyone's gone someplace I pick you up and in the trunk I've packed A cooler and a two day suitcase 'Cause there's a place we like to drive. Shaped by Community. Our mission at Power of Two is to nurture the inherent potential in every child and family — equipping them with the tools to transform their own lives and strengthen their communities. Meet Power of Two Families Are you a family who wants to get involved? The Power of Two Workbook: Communication Skills for a Strong & Loving Marriage (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook). In this example, we convert six numbers to powers of two at once. The first three numbers are round values of power of two (1024 = 2^10, 2048 = 2^11, 4096 = 2^12). However, the next three numbers have a decimal fraction as the power. We exclude the base prefix '2^' and use four digits for accuracy.
Sr. Pastor Darrell G Vaughn
Faithfulness – A Key Step to Happiness
Nov 28 2012: “The Power TWO!”
Sun AM Worship I know who I am and I know who God say I am and what God says I can do.
Text Matt 18:18-20 (King James Version)
“Father, I am your servant, willing and desiring to be used to bless your people.”
The Fields are white and the laborers are few!
C.H. Spurgeon said, “If God does not save a man by truth he certainly will not save them by lies, and if
C.H. Spurgeon said, “If God does not save a man by truth he certainly will not save them by lies, and if
the old gospel is not competent to work a revival, then we will do without the revival;”
A young woman brought her fiancée home to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother told her father to find out about the young man. The father invited the fiancée to his study for a talk.
'So what are your plans?' the father asked the young man.
'I am a biblical scholar,' he replied.
'A Biblical scholar. Hmmm,' the father said. 'Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in?'
'I will study,' the young man replied, 'and God will provide for us.'
Azuon crack. 'And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?' asked the father.
'I will concentrate on my studies,' the young man replied, 'God will provide for us.'
'And children?' asked the father. 'How will you support children?'
'Don’t worry, sir, God will provide,' replied the fiancée.
The conversation proceeded like this, and each time the father questioned, the young idealist insisted that God would provide.
Later, the mother asked, 'How did it go, Honey?'
The father answered, 'He has no job and no plans, and he thinks I’m God!'
'So what are your plans?' the father asked the young man.
'I am a biblical scholar,' he replied.
'A Biblical scholar. Hmmm,' the father said. 'Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in?'
'I will study,' the young man replied, 'and God will provide for us.'
Azuon crack. 'And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?' asked the father.
'I will concentrate on my studies,' the young man replied, 'God will provide for us.'
'And children?' asked the father. 'How will you support children?'
'Don’t worry, sir, God will provide,' replied the fiancée.
The conversation proceeded like this, and each time the father questioned, the young idealist insisted that God would provide.
Later, the mother asked, 'How did it go, Honey?'
The father answered, 'He has no job and no plans, and he thinks I’m God!'
Mat 18:18 Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.
Mat 18:19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.
Mat 18:20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.
Let’s pray. Father, Open my eyes so I can see Your truth.
Open my ears so I can hear Your voice. Open my mind so I can understand Your Word.
And open my heart so I may receive all that You want me to receive. AMEN
And open my heart so I may receive all that You want me to receive. AMEN
A. ILLUSTRATIONS
1. “If two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything, that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven” (Matt. 18:19).
2. Charles Finney, Abel Clary. Prayed and it led to the Second Great Awakening.
. Charles Finney, Abel Clary. Second Great Awakening.
Finney
His sermons were chain lightning, flashing conviction into the hearts of the stoutest skeptics. Simple as a child in his utterances, he sometimes startled his hearers by his unique prayers.' He could thunder the judgments of God upon sin with great liberty and power and then offer the mercy of the gospel with tenderness and tears. Without question he was a prophetic voice to 19th century America.
His ministry consistently produced revivals, even in areas considered hardened and unreceptive to the gospel. Finney's autobiography is filled with accounts of powerful manifestations of the Spirit. On one occasion when Finney was preaching in a school house, 'suddenly an awful solemnity fell upon the assembly and the congregation fell from their seats, crying for mercy.' Finney said, 'If I had had a sword in each hand I could not have cut them off as fast as they fell. I think the whole congregation was on their knees or prostrated in two minutes.' The crying and weeping of the people was so loud that Finney's exhortation of Christ's mercy could not even be heard.
'Finney seemed so anointed with the Holy Spirit that people were often brought under conviction of sin just by looking at him. When holding meetings at Utica, New York, he visited a large factory. At the sight of him one of the workers, and then another, and then another broke down and wept under a sense of their sins, and finally so many were sobbing and weeping that the machinery had to be stopped while Finney pointed them to Christ.'
Abel Clary
Abel Clary that laid the ground work for these mighty moves of God. 'Abel Clary was converted about the same time as Finney, and was licensed to preach also, but he had such a burden of prayer that he could not preach much. Finney wrote, 'Mr. Clary continued as long as I did and did not leave until after I had left. He never appeared in public, but gave himself wholly to prayer. His whole time and strength was given to prayer. He would writhe and groan in agony, unable to stand under the weight.' 'After Clary's death Finney discovered Clary's prayer journal. Finney found in the exact order of the burden laid upon Clary's heart was the order of blessing poured upon his ministry.'
2. D. L. Moody, Marianne Adland. 1872 English Revival.
3. D. L. Moody, Marianne Adland. Teamed up and the 1872 English Revival broke out.
4. Billy Graham, J. Edwin Orr. Teamed up and the 1949 Los Angeles Crusade took off.
3. Billy Graham and his prayer team
The Year: 1949
The Place: Los Angeles, California
The Results: An extended campaign that resulted in a change of approach in reaching mass number of people for Christ--leading to a new era of mass evangelism/crusades.
The Partners: Graham had conducted many similar events with much smaller results. He later realized that the only difference between the L.A. crusade and all the others before it had been the amount of prayer he and his people had given it.
B. WHAT CAN PRAYER DO?
1. If prayer did nothing other than what Jesus promised, it would be one of the greatest gifts God has given us. 'I tell you the truth, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete' (John 16:23-24).
2. But prayer does even more. It changes the ordinary man or woman and makes them extraordinary. Jesus taught His disciples that real PRAYER CHANGES ME
B. WHY THE POWER OF TWO?
1. “If two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything, that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven” (Matt. 18:19).
2. Charles Finney, Abel Clary. Prayed and it led to the Second Great Awakening.
. Charles Finney, Abel Clary. Second Great Awakening.
Finney
His sermons were chain lightning, flashing conviction into the hearts of the stoutest skeptics. Simple as a child in his utterances, he sometimes startled his hearers by his unique prayers.' He could thunder the judgments of God upon sin with great liberty and power and then offer the mercy of the gospel with tenderness and tears. Without question he was a prophetic voice to 19th century America.
His ministry consistently produced revivals, even in areas considered hardened and unreceptive to the gospel. Finney's autobiography is filled with accounts of powerful manifestations of the Spirit. On one occasion when Finney was preaching in a school house, 'suddenly an awful solemnity fell upon the assembly and the congregation fell from their seats, crying for mercy.' Finney said, 'If I had had a sword in each hand I could not have cut them off as fast as they fell. I think the whole congregation was on their knees or prostrated in two minutes.' The crying and weeping of the people was so loud that Finney's exhortation of Christ's mercy could not even be heard.
'Finney seemed so anointed with the Holy Spirit that people were often brought under conviction of sin just by looking at him. When holding meetings at Utica, New York, he visited a large factory. At the sight of him one of the workers, and then another, and then another broke down and wept under a sense of their sins, and finally so many were sobbing and weeping that the machinery had to be stopped while Finney pointed them to Christ.'
Abel Clary
Abel Clary that laid the ground work for these mighty moves of God. 'Abel Clary was converted about the same time as Finney, and was licensed to preach also, but he had such a burden of prayer that he could not preach much. Finney wrote, 'Mr. Clary continued as long as I did and did not leave until after I had left. He never appeared in public, but gave himself wholly to prayer. His whole time and strength was given to prayer. He would writhe and groan in agony, unable to stand under the weight.' 'After Clary's death Finney discovered Clary's prayer journal. Finney found in the exact order of the burden laid upon Clary's heart was the order of blessing poured upon his ministry.'
2. D. L. Moody, Marianne Adland. 1872 English Revival.
3. D. L. Moody, Marianne Adland. Teamed up and the 1872 English Revival broke out.
4. Billy Graham, J. Edwin Orr. Teamed up and the 1949 Los Angeles Crusade took off.
3. Billy Graham and his prayer team
The Year: 1949
The Place: Los Angeles, California
The Results: An extended campaign that resulted in a change of approach in reaching mass number of people for Christ--leading to a new era of mass evangelism/crusades.
The Partners: Graham had conducted many similar events with much smaller results. He later realized that the only difference between the L.A. crusade and all the others before it had been the amount of prayer he and his people had given it.
B. WHAT CAN PRAYER DO?
1. If prayer did nothing other than what Jesus promised, it would be one of the greatest gifts God has given us. 'I tell you the truth, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete' (John 16:23-24).
2. But prayer does even more. It changes the ordinary man or woman and makes them extraordinary. Jesus taught His disciples that real PRAYER CHANGES ME
B. WHY THE POWER OF TWO?
Ecc 4:9 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.
Ecc 4:10 For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.
Ecc 4:11 Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?
Ecc 4:12 And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
1. Strength. A bundle of sticks cannot be broken, i.e., “A threefold cord cannot be broken” (Ecc. 4:12).
2. Encouragement. “For if one falls down, his friend can lift him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up” (Ecc. 4:10 NIV).
3. Success. “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their work” (Ecc. 4:9 NIV).
4. Defense. “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves” (Ecc. 4:11 NIV).
5. Faith added to faith. “If two of you shall agree” (Matt. 18:19). “From faith to faith” (Rom. 1:17). “Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he that cometh to God, must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him” (Heb. 11:6).
Here’s what Jesus said.
1. Find someone to agree with you in prayer.
Matthew 18:19 (Amplified Bible) 'Again I tell you, if two of you on earth agree (harmonize together, make a symphony together) about whatever [anything and[everything] they may ask, it will come to pass and be done for them by My Father in heaven.'
Prayer partners are those who can agree and share the burden for the things for which you are praying.
The Greek word 'agree', is 'sumphoneo', the word from which is derived the English, 'symphony.'
One of the powerful aspects of a symphony orchestra is the way such a large number of instrumentalists work together to bring out the composer’s work.
Jesus is teaching us to likewise work together and harmonize with other Christ followers in our prayer lives. This gives our prayers great power. Together we achieve the work of our heavenly composer.
Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by my father in heaven.
Paul and Silas demonstrated the power of two as they sang in the jail at Philippi.
In response, God sent angels to shake the foundations of that jail.
Paul and Silas walked out of the jail with the keys in one hand and the converts in the other.
They knew the power of two.
There are two witnesses in Revelation 11 chapter the third verse, Enoch and Elijah.
They have the power to turn the water into blood.
They have the power to call the fire from heaven.
They have the power to call plagues and draught to cover the earth.
The Antichrist and all of the earth will hate them.
But they have that supernatural power because they are two people in agreement.
Jesus sent His disciples out two by two.
He gave them the authority to bind and loose things on this earth, and if they did so, this would be honored in heaven through the power of two.
Luke 11:21-22
21 For when a strong man like Satan is fully armed and guards his palace, his possessions are safe--
22 until someone even stronger attacks and overpowers him, strips him of his weapons, and carries off his belongings.
This scripture says that there is a strong man, satan, whose object is to attack you.
That strongman will attack your marriage, your health, your finances, your peace of mind, and your children, seeking to rob, to kill, and to destroy.
God has given you an answer to satan’s power.
That answer is to bind him was supernatural prayer, when you and another believer come into agreement.
Matthew 12:29
29 For who is powerful enough to enter the house of a strong man like Satan and plunder his goods? Only someone even stronger—someone who could tie him up and then plunder his house.
How much power can people in agreement have?
The answer: the power of life and death.
During the brutal reign of Joseph Stalin, who murdered 30 million Russians and bought godless communism to Russia, Stalin, let it be known that he planned to murder the Jews of Russia.
When the believers in England heard this report, they committed themselves to fasting and prayer for the Jews of Russia.
Praying in the spirit, they found the Demonic forces that drove Joseph Stalin.
Three weeks later, Joseph Stalin had a brain hemorrhage.
16 gifted brain surgeons worked on him for eight hours, and still Joseph Stalin stepped into eternity,
on March 5, 1953, to meet the son of God, a Jewish rabbi from Bethlehem.
Jesus said to his church, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven.
The message is very clear.
The initiative rests with you, not God!
Stop asking, when is God going to do something about my situation?
God has placed the responsibility of taking action squarely on your shoulders.
Start praying in Jesus name with a believer with whom you can come into agreement, and watch for powerful results.
What area of your life is under attack?
Your marriage?
Your children?
Your business?
Your finances?
Your health?
Your emotions?
Your relationships?
Find someone with whom you can agree right now.
Pray in the future tense.
Mark 11:24 (NIV) 'Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.'
3. Manage your motives in prayer.
John 14:13-14 (NLT) 'You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, because the work of the Son brings glory to the Father. 14Yes, ask anything in my name, and I will do it!'
God’s name is very powerful to be sure, but what Christ had in mind here was the motivation of our prayers.
Who’s name have you been praying in?
When David approached the Philistine champion Goliath he said, 'Thou comest to me with a sword, and with a spear, and with a shield: but I come to thee in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom thou hast defied.' (1 Samuel 17:45)
David was God’s ambassador, going in God’s name. He didn’t step on to the battlefield because he was looking for a name for himself.
When you pray, are your motives right?
James 4:3 (GNT) And when you ask, you do not receive it, because your motives are bad; you ask for things to use for your own pleasures.
4. Hold your ground in prayer.
John 15:7 (NLT) 'But if you stay joined to me and my words remain in you, you may ask any request you like, and it will be granted!'
We live in a very transient world. People change careers, addresses and even relationships often.
But you can’t afford to let instability characterize your relationship to Christ if you want prayers answered.
James 1..
1:5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
1:6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.
1:7 For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.
1:8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.
Matthew 7:7 (Amplified Bible) 'Keep on asking and it will be given you; keep on seeking and you will find; keep on knocking [reverently] and [the door] will be opened to you.'
Paul and Silas demonstrated the power of two as they sang in the jail at Philippi.
In response, God sent angels to shake the foundations of that jail.
Paul and Silas walked out of the jail with the keys in one hand and the converts in the other.
They knew the power of two.
There are two witnesses in Revelation 11 chapter the third verse, Enoch and Elijah.
They have the power to turn the water into blood.
They have the power to call the fire from heaven.
They have the power to call plagues and draught to cover the earth.
The Antichrist and all of the earth will hate them.
But they have that supernatural power because they are two people in agreement.
Jesus sent His disciples out two by two.
He gave them the authority to bind and loose things on this earth, and if they did so, this would be honored in heaven through the power of two.
Luke 11:21-22
21 For when a strong man like Satan is fully armed and guards his palace, his possessions are safe--
22 until someone even stronger attacks and overpowers him, strips him of his weapons, and carries off his belongings.
This scripture says that there is a strong man, satan, whose object is to attack you.
That strongman will attack your marriage, your health, your finances, your peace of mind, and your children, seeking to rob, to kill, and to destroy.
God has given you an answer to satan’s power.
That answer is to bind him was supernatural prayer, when you and another believer come into agreement.
Matthew 12:29
29 For who is powerful enough to enter the house of a strong man like Satan and plunder his goods? Only someone even stronger—someone who could tie him up and then plunder his house.
How much power can people in agreement have?
The answer: the power of life and death.
During the brutal reign of Joseph Stalin, who murdered 30 million Russians and bought godless communism to Russia, Stalin, let it be known that he planned to murder the Jews of Russia.
When the believers in England heard this report, they committed themselves to fasting and prayer for the Jews of Russia.
Praying in the spirit, they found the Demonic forces that drove Joseph Stalin.
Three weeks later, Joseph Stalin had a brain hemorrhage.
16 gifted brain surgeons worked on him for eight hours, and still Joseph Stalin stepped into eternity,
on March 5, 1953, to meet the son of God, a Jewish rabbi from Bethlehem.
Jesus said to his church, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven.
The message is very clear.
The initiative rests with you, not God!
Stop asking, when is God going to do something about my situation?
God has placed the responsibility of taking action squarely on your shoulders.
Start praying in Jesus name with a believer with whom you can come into agreement, and watch for powerful results.
What area of your life is under attack?
Your marriage?
Your children?
Your business?
Your finances?
Your health?
Your emotions?
Your relationships?
Find someone with whom you can agree right now.
Pray in the future tense.
Mark 11:24 (NIV) 'Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.'
3. Manage your motives in prayer.
John 14:13-14 (NLT) 'You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, because the work of the Son brings glory to the Father. 14Yes, ask anything in my name, and I will do it!'
God’s name is very powerful to be sure, but what Christ had in mind here was the motivation of our prayers.
Who’s name have you been praying in?
When David approached the Philistine champion Goliath he said, 'Thou comest to me with a sword, and with a spear, and with a shield: but I come to thee in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom thou hast defied.' (1 Samuel 17:45)
David was God’s ambassador, going in God’s name. He didn’t step on to the battlefield because he was looking for a name for himself.
When you pray, are your motives right?
James 4:3 (GNT) And when you ask, you do not receive it, because your motives are bad; you ask for things to use for your own pleasures.
4. Hold your ground in prayer.
John 15:7 (NLT) 'But if you stay joined to me and my words remain in you, you may ask any request you like, and it will be granted!'
We live in a very transient world. People change careers, addresses and even relationships often.
But you can’t afford to let instability characterize your relationship to Christ if you want prayers answered.
James 1..
1:5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
1:6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.
1:7 For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.
1:8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.
Matthew 7:7 (Amplified Bible) 'Keep on asking and it will be given you; keep on seeking and you will find; keep on knocking [reverently] and [the door] will be opened to you.'
Promise of answered Prayer
Mathew 18:19, gives us a definite assurance that there will always be an answered prayer when there is an agreement.
In the book of Daniel chapter 2, when King Nebuchadnezzar issued a decree because of his dream, when Daniel hear he had to request for time so that he could agree with his friends.
Daniel 2:5 (the decree), Daniel 2:14-19 (agreement)
The answer to their prayer came after the agreed on the matter (the interpretation, and not to be executed)
Conclusion:
1 Corinthians 1:
10I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought.
Mathew 18:19, gives us a definite assurance that there will always be an answered prayer when there is an agreement.
In the book of Daniel chapter 2, when King Nebuchadnezzar issued a decree because of his dream, when Daniel hear he had to request for time so that he could agree with his friends.
Daniel 2:5 (the decree), Daniel 2:14-19 (agreement)
The answer to their prayer came after the agreed on the matter (the interpretation, and not to be executed)
Conclusion:
1 Corinthians 1:
10I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought.
What would happen if you took two people and teamed them up to accomplish a goal? Return a few months later, and you might find them working well together and getting the job done. Or you might find them at each other's throats and accomplishing less than if they had worked independently.
An interesting puzzle lies between those extremes. Why do some partnerships succeed while others fail? Why do some people click while others clash?
One of the most neglected areas of human relationships is an understanding of what happens when two people team up to accomplish a task. Many books have been published to help readers understand themselves. Many more have been written about what makes a high-performing team or a great manager. But little has been done to guide two collaborators through their journey to reach a common goal.
People typically think of partnerships as formal arrangements, like the legal agreements between attorneys or between entrepreneurs. But a partnership -- good or bad -- exists whenever two people double up to accomplish an objective. Two students working on a term paper are partners until it is written. Two coaches of a kids' soccer team are partners until the season ends. Two accountants assigned to complete a financial audit are partners until the work is done. Although poorly understood, these relationships are crucial to your success and happiness.
Wired for partnership
Humans are made for collaboration. Our blood pressure rises and falls based on whether allies or enemies are nearby. We eat similar amounts when dining together. We laugh, not so much because something is funny, but because laughter is a kind of social glue. (A person is 30 times more likely to laugh when he's with someone else than when he is alone.)
One person observing another rehearses in his own mind what the other is doing. A network of 'mirror neurons' throughout the brain creates the empathy we need to see the partnership from the other person's perspective. We unconsciously adjust our grammar and word choices to match what someone else already said -- a subconscious way of signaling 'I agree with you.' This kind of mimicry, one study found, 'is automatic and reflects the fact that humans are designed for dialogue rather than monologue.'
The mere presence of a collaborator alters a person's perception of the world around her. When experimenters filled a transparent box with potatoes and asked volunteers to guess its weight, people who were told someone else would be helping them lift the box estimated it to be lighter than those who believed they would have to pick it up by themselves. 'These results suggest we may see the world not only through our own eyes but also through the eyes of the groups we form,' wrote one researcher. 'We plan our actions guided partly by what we think we can achieve with others.'
In a world that emphasizes individual achievement -- the star salesperson, the MVP, the soloist -- we forget that everyone is descended from millions of ancestors who survived because they didn't go it alone. Today, failing to form partnerships will handicap your career and decrease your happiness. In the past, it could get you killed.
In the many dangerous generations that molded human nature, our predecessors' survival required not only strong bones and muscles, resistance to disease, and the ability to make tools, but also the ability to collaborate -- to discern, trust, sacrifice, empathize, and intelligently combine their work with someone else. For our predecessors, survival 'depended on dealing with their neighbors: sometimes helping them, sometimes ignoring them, sometimes exploiting them, sometimes liking them, sometimes hating them -- and having a sense for which people warrant which sort of treatment, and when they warrant it,' wrote Robert Wright in his book The Moral Animal. 'The evolution of human beings has consisted largely of adaptation to one another.' Hunters who worked together were more likely to return with a kill. Two men who made a pact to help each other improved their odds of fending off mutual enemies.
Along the way, humans developed exceptionally large brains, organs that are expensive in biological terms. The brain accounts for only 3% of the body's weight, but it consumes 20% of the oxygen and glucose a person takes in. An organ that needy must justify its fuel bill, and it does. We need nimble, adaptable brains to navigate the terrain of our large and complex social networks. People 'probably encounter no problems more challenging than those of dealing with other members of their community,' wrote one observer. 'Judging whom to trust, forming alliances, keeping score of favors given and received -- all were necessities made easier by greater cognitive ability.'
Self-imposed solitary confinement
Yet for all our instincts, most of us today don't fully exploit our collaborative potential. Gallup research reveals that the median number of work partnerships for an American employee is four, but there is a tremendous range around that number. When asked how many strong alliances they have, most people say they have one or two, maybe three or four. The small proportion of people who say they have dozens of close teammates raises the average for a population that is generally partnership-poor. 'In thinking through my best and worst work partnerships, I keep seeing more experiences in the 'worst' column and a sparsely populated 'best' section,' said one manager at a medical device manufacturer.
The most common number of work partnerships -- the answer given by 16% of the U.S. adult population -- is zero! Asked if they have ever had a great partnership at work, about one quarter of employees say no.
The more partnerships you have, the better. Even one strong collaborative relationship markedly increases your well-being over those who are going it alone. Compared with their isolated coworkers, those with just one collaborative relationship are 29% more likely to say they will stay with their company for the next year and 42% more likely to intend to remain with their current employer for their entire career. Those who feel well teamed with one or more colleagues are substantially more engaged at work; they generate higher customer scores, safety, retention, creativity, productivity, and profitability for the business and a greater level of happiness for themselves. On the other end of the scale, isolation creates a health risk on par with smoking. Solitary confinement is considered by many a form of torture, but many people impose it on themselves in their daily lives.
'The sad thing is that I've never had a successful partnership,' one businessperson said. 'I've been thrown into the leadership role in every single 'group project' or organized group outside or inside of schooling. Every time, I have become the leader, ended up doing the majority of the work, and gotten the majority of the credit. I've learned -- again, sadly -- that I'm better at taking care of my responsibilities myself and not depending on others for creative success in my personal, artistic, or professional futures.'
One of the reasons partnerships fail is that every cooperative instinct is matched by a competitive reflex: deep-seated desires to not be taken advantage of, to come out on top, or to extract revenge. Not knowing what to expect from a new counterpart, every potential collaborator faces a friend-or-foe dilemma. While failing to work together was often fatal to ancient humans, so was being fooled by an adversary. Fearful of being made a fool or wanting to win, many people play it safe, failing to put enough of themselves on the line to start a collaboration. And when they do, their counterparts often fail to reciprocate.
But many people who are slow to make peaceful overtures are not afraid to go to battle stations at the first hint of hostilities. As a consequence, acrimonious relationships are at least as common as partnerships. Bickering over anything from office locations to a piece of legislation can collapse into years of animosity.
Great partnerships are hard work
The double-edged nature of social instincts means that collaboration requires much more than just pairing up two people and pointing them up the mountain. When two companies sign a 'joint marketing agreement' and team up their salespeople, some pairs inevitably fail. 'In good relationships, reps work cooperatively, openly, and effectively as true partners,' found one study of joint sales efforts. 'In poor relationships, reps withhold information from each other; point fingers when someone 'drops the ball'; question the competence, integrity, and standards of the partner; and express a high degree of frustration with, and negativity toward, the partnering concept.'
Great partnerships don't just happen. If both partners don't really need the talents of the other, there is no reason to team up. If they lack a common mission -- the foundation of any joint endeavor -- the two will work at cross-purposes. If they don't divide the work and rewards fairly, one of the collaborators will take his marbles and go home. Without a willingness by each of them take substantial risks, and reciprocation from both of them, they will never develop the rhythm of trust that defines collaboration. The alliance will implode unless both learn to accept the idiosyncrasies of the other. If one of them betrays the other, he unleashes powerful, negative reactions, and the relationship can be extricated only with great difficulty. Unless partners learn to communicate well, they will eventually knock heads or make deal-wrecking assumptions about the other's intentions. Failure on any one of these aspects can destroy the alliance.
In the rare circumstances when all these obstacles are overcome, partnerships can become not just effective in accomplishing the mission, but personally rewarding -- sometimes intensely so. Researchers call this 'mutuality,' a phenomenon when a natural concern for one's own welfare transforms into a deep satisfaction in seeing one's counterpart do well. Those who have reached this level say such collaborations become among the most fulfilling aspects of their lives. It is one thing to have accomplished a great goal alone, they say, but these individual achievements cannot compare to doing great things together.
Ultimately, the same cooperative instincts that allowed our distant ancestors to survive can bring greater success and happiness to us if we apply them in our most important undertakings. 'If I were teaching students about entrepreneurship, I'd point out that many of the great startups of the last thirty years began as teams of two,' wrote Forbes Publisher Rich Karlgaard. 'Behind this phenomenon is a principle: Build on your strengths. To mitigate your weaknesses -- and we all have them -- partner up! Find your complement.'
Power Of Two List
Everyone faces challenges where success is anything but certain. If you overcome them, chances are, you won't do it alone.
The Eight Elements of a Powerful PartnershipGreat partnerships don't just happen. Whether your joint mission is to build a successful company, coach a team, improve the government, do something spectacular for a charity, or any other worthy goal, all successful partnerships share the same crucial ingredients. When all these elements combine, partnerships become not just effective in accomplishing the mission, but also personally rewarding, sometimes intensely so. Complementary Strengths: Everyone has weaknesses and blind spots that create obstacles to reaching a goal. One of the most powerful reasons for teaming up is working with someone who is strong where you are weak, and vice versa. Individuals are not well-rounded, but pairs can be. A Common Mission: When a partnership fails, the root cause is often that the two people were pursuing separate agendas. When partners want the same thing badly enough, they will make the personal sacrifices necessary to see it through. Fairness: Humans have an instinctive need for fairness. Because the need for fairness runs deep, it is an essential quality of a strong partnership. Trust: Working with someone means taking risks. You are not likely to contribute your best work unless you trust that your partner will do his or her best. Without trust, it's easier to work alone. Acceptance: We see the world through our own set of lenses. Whenever two disparate personalities come together, there is bound to be a certain friction from their differences. This can be a recipe for conflict unless both learn to accept the idiosyncrasies of the other. Forgiveness: People are imperfect. They make mistakes. They sometimes do the wrong thing. Without forgiveness, the natural revenge motives that stem from friend-or-foe instincts will overpower all the reasons to continue a partnership, and it will dissolve. Communicating: In the early stages of a partnership, communicating helps to prevent misunderstandings; later in the relationship, a continuous flow of information makes the work more efficient by keeping the two people synchronized. Unselfishness: In the best working relationships, the natural concern for your own welfare transforms into gratification in seeing your comrade succeed. Those who have reached this level say such collaborations become among the most fulfilling aspects of their lives. |
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Employee EngagementGallup Business JournalLeadershipPartnershipPerformance ManagementTrustWorkplace
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